Pyschaotic Mind Of A Dying Male

Its…1:04 am
Damn am I bored!
@__@…

Gonna switch music video’s today

From Six Days by DJ Shadow
Its gonna be Ecstasy by ATB

They’re both old songs, but you know, sometimes oldies are nice too lol
So they are not hard enough, but aslong as they sound good I dun see much problem huh?

Anyway, the video doesn’t make much sense, but the song is good haha…
Oh yea, Pharmacy was pretty cooooolllll…they played Operation Blade! I like that song! Hehe…
And they played a few more, now, is it Zombie Nation or Domination? God knows, I’ll find out one day =.=||
BUT that tune is hot, eventhough its old, I just realize, alot of songs are old, but they still hype people up
So, conclusion is, that electronic music, never really dies…do they?

Same Panda time, Same Panda channel~

The time is 3:12am

Why the hell on God’s green earth I’m still awake, I have no idea
I slept at 8pm and got up at 3am
Its still not enough sleep by the way lol…
I’m still debating with my head if I still want to go for Costing or not…

See if I don’t go, I probably missed it twice already lol…
Who knows??…should I, shouldn’t I….no idea…

Ok…so I just contacted a friend and he told me we do have class
Sometimes I wish I just kept quiet and didn’t ask, then I could get my extra sleep?
Then sometimes, you know, I have to go, or I’d be wasting my parent’s money
No, I’m not those smart son or shit, but you know, its money, don’t fucking waste it…

Anyway…so…I’m so fucking tired…I have no idea why
As in why I’m tired and why I’m swearing all over this blog today, but I guess the title says it…
Tomorrow! Will be a better day…I think…

Harsequence presents….Pharmacy @ Ruums
10pm to 3am
Dress code : Black

Infiltrate. Destroy.Rebuild.
With Drive, Learn, Hellraiser ( Australia ), and Derb ( Germany )

I don’t think I know any of the DJ’s =.=|| but I guess new is good lol…
Peace….

Die Nacht öffnet ihren Schoß ( The night opens her lap )
Das Kind heißt Einsamkeit ( The child’s name is loneliness )
Es ist kalt und regungslos ( It is cold and motionless )
Ich weine leise in die Zeit ( I cry softly into time )
Ich weiß nicht wie du heißt ( I don’t know what your name is… )
Doch ich weiß dass es dich gibt ( But I know you exist… )
Ich weiß dass irgendwann ( I know that sometime )
irgendwer mich liebt ( Someone will love me )

He comes to me every night
No words are left to say
With his hands around my neck
I close my eyes and pass away

I don’t know who he is
In my dreams he does exist
His passion is a kiss
And I can not resist

Ich warte hier ( I wait here )
Don’t die before I do
Ich warte hier ( I wait here )
Stirb nicht vor mir ( Don’t die before I do… )

I don’t know who you are
I know that you exist
Stirb nicht ( Don’t die )
Sometimes love seems so far
Ich warte hier ( I wait here… )
Your love I can’t dismiss
Ich warte hier ( I wait here…. )

Alle Häuser sind verschneit ( All the houses are covered in snow… )
Und in den Fenstern Kerzenlicht ( And candle lights the windows… )
Dort liegen sie zu zweit ( They lie there together )
Und ich ( And I… )
Ich warte nur auf dich ( I only wait for you… )

Ich warte hier ( I wait here…. )
Don’t die before I do
Ich warte hier ( I wait here… )
Stirb nicht vor mir ( Don’t die before I do… )

I don’t know who you are
I know that you exist
Stirb nicht ( Don’t die… )
Sometimes love seems so far
Ich warte hier ( I wait here… )
Your love I can’t dismiss

Stirb nicht vor mir ( Don’t die before I do…. )

U have just learned some German, now u can sing to Mr.Gerhad…
Like always,

Same Panda Channel! Same Panda Time!

Its 10:03pm
Well, yesterday I had this weird dream, not weird
But it was sad I guess?…

I blame it all on the movie ” Noel ”
But you know, maybe this dream, I dreamnt it for a reason
Here it is :

As I looked downstairs from the upstairs of my house, I saw a silhoutte of a girl I knew, she waved at me, and I was stunned…
I went downstairs, into the spare room and saw her…dressed in a red turtle neck, with the sleeves cut out…
She smiled at me, and went on her bed….
So I got on, and lied my head on her stomach and looked up…
She grabbed me by the cheeks and started playing with my face while saying

” Ian, Ian, Ian… ”
” Why don’t you let go…? ”
” It’s already too late, you came too late, there’s no more chance for you ”
” Give up, Ian… ”

Suffice to say, I was stunned and woke up, saddened…
I didn’t understand what it meant, I didn’t know why she said it like that…
Is it really time to give up, to let go, of all this?…
All kinds of things ran through my mind, and couldn’t imagine of what to do…
I told it to a friend, but I guess he can’t really relate to it…

Now I know, after almost 1 year+, I realize, for that 1 year+, I was never happy
She was gone, and I was there begging for forgiveness…
I realize now, sometimes you can never get forgiveness on certain things you have done
But you just gotta keep going on…right…?…
There were times I comtemplated suicide, but its just stupid isn’t it…

Some New/Old drawings from the old and battered blue book
One that says CVS on it, but I’ll just rename it as my drawing pad
Anyway, here are some drawings…for the people that haven’t seen my drawing pad ever in their lives,
Then, this all shud be new lol…

1. Inspired by 千里之外 video, watch it, and u’ll know why

2. Mani-festo

3. Crazy Biatch

4. The Link To Hell Is Her ( Alittle off center, but oh well… )

5. Dysfuntional Piece Of Shit

Thank you for watching, as always, same Panda time, same Panda channel~

In the beginning of time,
There was darkness…
As I lay rest in my mother’s womb,
I soon became part of the life growth…
Young at body, evil at thought…
Through fiddling around,
I became aware of…death…

- Innocence - Taint - Power - Murder - Madness -
- Money - Sloth - Adultery - Requiem - Porn -
- Blood - Tears - Pain - Heart Broken - Destroy -

Which one are u…Hehehehehe…

Yup today is Sunday
2.37pm

Recently I just took down the SG Wannabe video’s
Replaced them with Six Days Remix by DJ Shadow
It was the opening music to the film, Tokyo Drift
Its nice yeah?…well I don’t know about u guys, buy I like it heh…

So yesterday we were at Ruums once again
Cuz its like this religious meeting, every saturday we’d be there worshipping the sounds of bass lol…
Nah just kidding…so my friend got smashed after one too many drinks
He was puking on the floor and lying around…and started spittin on himself

But he was alright
He was just ” alittle ” heavy for me to carry from upstairs all the way downstairs
Its that dead weight ppl get after getting all drunk
Damn u alcohol, u say ur nice, but in the end u turned out to be a bad person lol…

So we got to see Poison Violet, from…KL I think?
Yeah she’s not bad at all, I think she’s so far the only girl I see in KL playing hard trance
Should have taken a picture of her, she’s kind of pretty haha…

Met a old college friend there, but I can’t seem to remember her name… =.=||
Oh well…music was alright, not so bad, the rhythm,
It was like Fast-Slow-Fast-Slow
I rather take Slow-Fast-Fast-Slow
If u even get what I’m saying lol…

So I called my dead friend from last night and asked him if he was alright
He said he was fine, and ready for more the next coming week
Good job man, ur a hero, and I think ur too famous now in Ruums lol…

Last thing, is Ruums pronounced RUM’s or ROOMS??
U know what, I’ll stick to ROOMS

Its…8:19pm
So what happened today…
I woke up late, and couldn’t go for accounting/costing class
Heh heh…how many times I skip already I also dunno, but its ok ^__^
So I went to Ms.Gan’s class, which is Garde Manger

Its alright, we learned how to make sandwiches, though I already know some of them
I guess its better to learn more
So today she called me crazy, but its ok also, I think its kinda true haha…

Alamak, I talking to other people about other story and laugh also call me crazy, what to do
And then I wanna talk abit people call me to keep quiet
So sad ar…someone told me silence is golden…my lan jiao its golden =.=…

So er…nothing lor just come and go…so boring…
Then tomorrow is a saturday…but must go for a test….T___T
Where got such things wan? Class at saturday…no fair la….
Stupid KDU…really stupid…

Its interesting to annoy Ms.Gan
She gets angry and I laugh hahahahaha…
Gotta love that…She’d ask me to get something and I’d say, ” Where?? Where?? ”
Or she’d ask me to find someone I’d say ” Who is that? Where is she/he? ”
Or sometimes I startle some of my classmates by saying ” Who are u? How come I never see u before? ”
Yeah, its funny cuz they have seen me for the past couple of months and I act as if I never seen them once hehe…
Dun worry guys, I do know ur names =.=…

So, basically I’m broke for this week and next week
I won’t be able to go anywhere, so just sit at home lor…
>___< so depressing ahaha….k la…something more fun comes up, u know I’d be posting
Peaacceeeee

+ News +
- It is indeed 5 years since the tragedy had occured
- Though some may look at it differently, some people thought ” Americans got what they deserved ”
- The fact of the matter is, many innocent died, and alot of people lost their loved ones
- Many fire fighters went into the burning building, trying to save people that they don’t even know
- It is not the time to mourn, or be sad, it is the time to be happy that such heroes had lived.

For the rest that thought it served them right…
I don’t know what to say =.=||…it doesn’t make sense why innocent people deserve what had happened
You obviously can’t open your eyes and see the bigger picture
” Americans ” are not all white…
They are made out of such a big diversed race with many religions
How can these people had gotten what they deserve?…=.=||
Not all of them are arrogant, not all of them are power hungry
We suffer the same things each and every country has like poverty, violence, racism, sexism, etc

Don’t hate the people, nor the country, hate the leader

Ahhh…
So I just added two new videos to the profile
Why? Cuz its nice lor…

1. Timeless
Running Time : 10 Minutes ( O__O )

2. I Love You To Death
Running Time : 9 Minutes ( O__O )

Both of these videos go together, if you watch it, you’ll know what I mean…
Its been awhile since I posted these sad videos lol…
I posted Timeless before, but never knew there was a ” Girl Version ” of this video
So, since I just found it today, here it is ^__^ for you viewing pleasure I guess?…

Peaaaccceeee….